past events - tots

maybe there are noone reading this dairy of mine anymore as i have not written for a long long time. busy with my work life - trying to handle staff's problems everyday..they too rely on HR dept..., busy with my love life - till now i still have some disagreement with my mr bf but disagreements are solved quickly, busy hanging out with my close friends - GC,JC,AY,ET,MN,EL,LH and lastly QF. these few are the most important friends in my life. well, i am not trying to say bad things about myself or bad omen fall upon me. i just wana say if there is anything happen to me, i hope i am able to see all my closest friends b4 i die..
sometimes, i am really tired..mentally tired. friends and especially colleagues everyday see me LOLZ at work...thinking i can solve every problem easily...thinking i do not have stress..thinking i have zero stress in my head. but what they didnt know is that i am super duper stress... stress till toilet only goes once or twice in a day. WTF. these few days i really feeling very sad. EL,LH,MN and QF are always there for me whenever i needed them...my emotion is really breaking down.. i didnt told my family members about it as i do not know how to tell them.. its so hard to control... lately, have been spenting quite alot on myself..bought some branded bags for myself - reward myself for working hard. am i silly to do that? haiz..wth..i dont really care.its my $ and i want to spent it. i know QF is very busy with his work and he has his own friends to go out with but he still try to make some time for me and accompany me.. xie xie ni.. i appreciate what you did. you show me how true friends really went all the way to help you. not to mentioned, my ex( i guess u know who u are) - thanks for lending your shoulder... i mean it...

thanks for all the help, my dear friends.